I have a confession; sometimes I am afraid of food. It sounds bizarre, but it is true. There are days when I feel like everything I eat, no matter what it is, makes me feel sick and in pain. So, sometimes I’m afraid to eat. I read every food label and make sure it doesn’t contain wheat, corn, sugar, or milk. I even have to watch the texture. Going grocery shopping can be a nightmare. No one caters towards people like me. It seems like eating real food is an anomaly and safe foods are hard to find, so I started making my own. I started making everything “from scratch.”
Believe it or not, I ate a completely liquid diet for a year until I could re-introduce solid foods. Was it a hardship, kind of, but I didn’t mind. It made me realize the nutritional value of each item I ate. Plus, I like to cook and it is fun when people ask you "wow, did you make this from scratch?”
I was the only one who had to eat this way. Everyone else in my family could eat anything they wanted. That was until this week. I started noticing my son was starting to have behavioral problems. Not crazy behavioral problems, but enough to make me think “what is happening to my kid?”
Let me explain, most of the time my son is a doll. He is feisty and fearless, but he is kind and has manners and is a “yes, Momma,” “I love you Momma,” kind of kid. But there are times when it is like a switch gets flipped and he turns into a little tornado. He can’t control his energy or his movement and his attitude is monstrous. It’s like Destructo has entered the building. I don’t even recognize my own kid.
We had two instances just this week. One was at a get together among my Momma friends. I had to leave because all of a sudden my son was not listening, speaking rudely, and having unruly behavior. He fell asleep on the way home and woke up a brand new kid. The other was at his speech therapy appointment. He was so wound up and jittery. It was as if he was shaking with energy. His therapist even commented and said “this is different for him. Something is happening.” I said “I know. He is so full of energy. This is not like him. I don’t know what to do.” So we put our heads together and worked backwards from that moment to the time he woke up. We came to the conclusion that both instances of this crazy behavior happened not long after he ate. I’ve been watching and tracking his behavior and it seems like these instances happen after he eats food containing food dye, white flour, and/or sugar. Take them out of his diet, and he acts totally different. No joke, you give him one of these things and he will go a little crazy, fall asleep and then wake up a completely different kid. Like he doesn’t even know what happened.
It makes me question, what is in our food? I thought I was making healthy food choices for him. He loves fruits and vegetables and eats balances meals, but you add in some gold fish crackers, something with high fructose corn syrup, or heaven forbid a Gogurt, and you will see a change in him…and not a good one. So that got me thinking…he’s 4 ½, almost 5, how can I change his diet and still keep him interested in eating it? We don’t want to revisit the squash incident of 2015…let’s just say we were going to see that bite of squash he ate again…and quickly! What goes down must come back up? Um, no thanks.
My answer is scratch. I am going to make his favorite foods (like bread and gold fish crackers) from scratch and eliminate processed foods and foods made with refined white flour and sugar. I will keep a little bit of honey though. I know it is still sugar, but it is a more natural form of sugar and it can be more easily monitored.
Ah, “from scratch,” that seems to be my new motto. I feel like I am rebuilding my life from scratch. It is going to take time to cook and bake everything myself, but I find it fitting. Things are changing. I’m spending more time at home and life is being lived at a slower pace. It’s a new phase of life, one devoted to resting and healing, and now I get to heal my son too.
We are baking Whole Wheat Bread today. It is made with whole wheat flour and honey and molasses instead of sugar. It looks and smells amazing. If you are thinking “I can’t do that, it takes too much time.” I understand. Making this bread did take a few hours, but it is just like spending time in the afternoon watching a movie, but maybe better for you!
I hope you have a great day. Feel free to comment if you would a copy of the recipes that I am using. I would be more than happy to share.
Hi there! Welcome to Grace In A Glass. My name is Danielle and I am so happy that you are visiting this site today. We all have something in life that we are working to overcome. I began blogging about my struggle with overcoming Esophageal Dysmotility and Crohn's Disease with the hope of reaching others with words of encouragement and hope. Thank you for letting me share my stories with you, and hope you have the most wonderful day!